Strong? Me? How could you think that i were strong? If I were, I wouldn't have bothered with him. If I were strong like you think, I would have been much more content to sit and wait and wish.
I would have kept on looking or ignoring the love I thought I wanted until it found me and sprung upon me a great peace, rather than the tumultuos deluge the last 2 years have turned out to be.
If I were strong i would have found contentment in the peace of knowing he wasn't for me, rather than chasing him down and forcing him to lie about what he was and who he needed.
Granted i have avoided a greater failing. I have performed preventative maintenance on my life and found a temporary repreive. I can sigh relief for a moment in knowing that things can only get better.
But if I were strong, I would never have had cause to regret whom I chose to give my life to.
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" lonely... But I'm not, I'm so happy, so content.... but I can't help feeling-- when I'm having these dreams.... an overwhelming sense of loneliness... like I'm trapped in another universe and I can only see them, I can't reach them..."
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